


Hitchhiking

by occultclysms



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Serial Killers, Flirting, Knives, Late at Night, M/M, Spooky, Trees, unconventional flirting
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-10
Updated: 2020-12-10
Packaged: 2021-03-07 21:07:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,297
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26744122
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/occultclysms/pseuds/occultclysms
Summary: They always warn never to pick up hitch-hikers because they might be serial killers... but the heart wants what it wants.
Relationships: Kim Jongin | Kai/Park Chanyeol
Comments: 8
Kudos: 33
Collections: Honey Boy: Round 1





	Hitchhiking

They always warn never to pick up hitch-hikers because they might be serial killers. But there are actually very few serial killers in the world, so it isn’t a worry of Jongin’s. Besides, he’s not some shrimpy looking guy, so it would be decently hard to overpower him in a fight or something like that.

But Jongin ignores all of his good logic for a pretty boy. The root of all his problems always comes back to pretty boys who Jongin just can’t say no to. That’s how he lost his grandmother’s ring to a stripper. Never again. 

Except, now he’s doing it again, albeit with less chance of losing so much money. The stranger pushes his hair behind his ear and smiles awkwardly which makes this decision seem a bit more worth it.

“I’m Chanyeol. Thanks for picking me up. I know it’s practically the middle of the night, but I really appreciate it. You never know who could be out here,” Chanyeol introduces. He buckles his seatbelt and Jongin starts the car again.

“I’m Jongin. So what are you doing out here all by yourself on a night like this?” Jongin asks. A night like this— one with fog so thick you can’t even see more than ten feet ahead of you and temperature decidedly less than fifty degrees really isn’t the best time to be out. Chanyeol doesn’t even blink before answering.

“I was with my now ex-boyfriend,” Chanyeol begins. “I had been wanting to break up with him for awhile, and I meant to do it earlier tonight but then we got to the end of our date and I just had to rip off the band aid. Though, that led to me being kicked out and now needing a ride home. Or just back to the city at the least.”

“Oh, I see,” Jongin replies. He doesn’t want to come off the wrong way which means that he’s overthinking every single thought he has. But that just rubs Chanyeol the wrong way anyway as they don’t say anything else.

The silence drags on and on. It isn’t like Jongin isn’t wracking his brain for things to talk about— it’s just that everything he can think of seems too personal a subject or too impersonal a subject. Apparently, Chanyeol is breaking under the silence as well.

“Oh, it’s so quiet out here,” Chanyeol points out. What a way to state the obvious. “You could kill someone and nobody would even notice.” Well, that’s not great. Maybe Chanyeol is just one of those weird people who think about death all the time, because the probability of Jongin, a serial killer, picking up another serial killer hitchhiking is some other level of absurd. The universe would just be screwing with him at that point, so he settles with the former and decides to double down on Chanyeol’s comment.

“Even if you were to scream, there’s no one here to come help you. And then— maybe someone is around that could potentially get you help. How would they find the exact location where you are because these trees are as thick as thieves,” Jongin says, watching Chanyeol’s expression out of the corner of his eye carefully.

One of his eyebrows ticks up almost involuntarily and it snaps right back into place. That look of intrigue is impossible to ignore when Chanyeol’s expression turns sour. That’s a fake sour look if Jongin’s ever seen one. The car turns to silence again and Jongin is pleased he at least managed to derail that conversation before it went a bit too far.

“You raise a good point,” Chanyeol replies eventually, straightening himself and crossing his arms. Jongin doesn’t even know how to reply. Who does this guy think he is? “I can’t stand silences, I’m sorry. So, anyway, what’s your favorite kind of knife?”

Alright, there’s something very wrong with this situation. But Jongin can’t jump to the worst conclusion yet. Chanyeol probably doesn’t think that Jongin is about to throw him out of the car yet, so he should use that to his advantage.

“Zwilling J.A. Henckels Mungsten Damast 8" Limited Edition Damascus Chef's Knife.” It’s really a no-brainer choice. The Damascus Chef’s Knife is the best knife for dismembering bodies and doesn’t make blood spray everywhere even when slicing through the thicker parts of a person.

“Oh yeah, super shiny.” Is Chanyeol trying to clue Jongin into something or what? 

“Yeah,” Jongin mumbles. Eyes on the road. This will be over soon enough. The trees will end and so will the fog.

“In fact, I have one right here.” Jongin’s eyes turn away from the road and sees said knife in Chanyeol’s hand. The car swerves and Jongin straightens it back on the road, but doesn’t stop the car. Instead, he ups the gas. The faster they are going, the less likely Chanyeol is to stab him because that could also injure Chanyeol.

“Wait a minute,” Jongin protests. “You’re not allowed to stab me!”

“And why is that?” Chanyeol asks, clearly excited by Jongin’s protests— which is another red flag on it’s own.

“I am  _ also _ a serial killer.” 

“Huh?” Chanyeol slouches back in his chair and the knife angle is now far less aggressive than before. “Okay, pull the car over.”

“But then you might stab me,” Jongin points out.

“We’ve established you’re like me though, so I won’t stab you.” And Chanyeol seems genuine, so Jongin slows down the speed of the car, looking at Chanyeol’s knife intermittently. Sensing Jongin’s hesitancy, Chanyeol drops his knife on the floor of the car. Okay, that has to be good enough for now.

Jongin throws the car into park and looks at Chanyeol who takes a deep breath in through his nose before picking up the knife again.

“Alright, what the fuck was that?” Chanyeol emphasizing his point by pointing the knife ever closer to Jongin.

“Quit pointing your knife at me!” Jongin whines. But little does Chanyeol know, Jongin has his own knife. He just couldn’t take it out while driving. Jongin whips out his own knife and gives Chanyeol a pitying look. Chanyeol gasps.

“Oh, that’s kinda hot,” Chanyeol says.

“What do you mean this is hot?” Jongin splutters. “I don’t play with knives. I’m literally pointing a knife at you. I could stab you right now.”

“And I think that’s kinda hot,” Chanyeol defends.

“Okay, but why?” Jongin asks as genuinely as he can. “I don’t kill people because I think knives are hot— I kill people because I have anger issues.”

“Usually when I kill people they are all like ‘oh no, don’t kill me!’” Chanyeol explains. “And that just kinda does it for me.  _ This _ is doing it for me.”

“Dude.”

“Dude.”

“This is weird,” Jongin says.

“Is it really though?” Chanyeol asks, cocking his head to one side. Curse his attractiveness. It would get through to Jongin on any other day, except that there are two knives between them and that’s preventing him from thinking with his dick right now. Which—-just to be perfectly clear--is for the best.

“Yes, it’s very weird. I can’t believe I picked up another serial killer in my car!” Jongin exclaims. “I finally get a day off from work, so tonight is my free murder, y’know. And then you show up.”

“Do you wanna maybe get out of here?” Chanyeol asks, completely changing the subject. “I feel a bit bad now for messing up your plans. Well, what about this? I know a really popular section of the woods. People are always up there camping and that way we can both get what we want here.”

“You’re offering to help me kill someone?” Jongin clarifies.

“I kinda wanna see how you use that knife,” Chanyeol replies, licking his lips and looking at Jongin seductively. Well, maybe his dick and his head can work together tonight. This seems like a perfectly solid plan and any other options aren’t really jumping out to Jongin at the moment.

“Okay, whatever you say,” Jongin mutters. “Where do I go from here?” Chanyeol directs Jongin only a few minutes away which is pretty convenient as Chanyeol is riding Jongin’s nerves a bit. Sure, he’s hot and they share a mutual uncommon hobby, but he’s also annoying the shit out of Jongin. Jongin doesn’t even have a reason to be so annoyed so quickly, which means he’ll just ignore it for now.

Jongin parks the car, but before either of them can get out, Jongin locks the doors. Chanyeol looks at him strangely.

“Leave your knife in the car. I want to see that there’s some prime meat there before letting you take a weapon with you,” Jongin says. “I’ll leave mine as well.” Chanyeol pouts, but drops his knife and gets out of the car. Jongin does the same, except he sets his down carefully, so as not to scratch the leather of his car.

“It’s just right this way. There’s some trees and then it clears up,” Chanyeol says, walking ahead of Jongin, who’s already getting excited. Maybe he can find some asshole who doesn’t even deserve to live anyway. There’s a small skip in his step as he catches up to Chanyeol.

“This still seems a bit dark,” Jongin points out, trying to spot any form of light up ahead.

“They probably put their fire out already.” They walk for a few minutes, but Jongin is starting to get antsy and Chanyeol must have caught onto it as he shoves Jongin up against a tree.

Before Jongin can say anything, Chanyeol has a smaller pocket version of the Zwilling J.A. Henckels Mungsten Damast 8" Limited Edition Damascus Chef's Knife against Jongin’s neck. Just hard enough that Jongin feels the metal, but not hard enough to make him bleed.

“God damn it!” Jongin exclaims. “This is why you can never trust a serial killer.” Chanyeol laughs and licks his lips. “Oh, and by the way— I’m not going to indulge your knife kink.”

“Come on,” Chanyeol whines, sounding genuinely disappointed in the turn of events. “So you’re just gonna let me kill you? That’s no fun.”

“Suck it.” Jongin sticks out his tongue for good measure and Chanyeol’s nostrils flare indignantly. Chanyeol yanks the knife away and grabs Jongin’s arm, dragging him deeper into the wood. To make sure Jongin won’t run away, Chanyeol presses the knife into the side of his neck.

“Don’t even think about running,” Chanyeol threatens. “I was top of my class when I took knife throwing lessons at the community college here.”

“Community college knife throwing, really? I expected better from you,” Jongin replies, now just trying to get under Chanyeol’s skin in some way.

“Serial killing doesn’t pay the bills, now does it?” Chanyeol counters and Jongin will admit that he has a point. When they can no longer even see a hint of the road, Chanyeol lets go of Jongin. 

“You’re just letting me go?” Jongin questions, not trusting Chanyeol even a little bit.

“You can run.” Jongin narrows his eyes. This has to be some sort of trick.

“I’m not going to run,” Jongin decides.

“Why?” Chanyeol is shocked and his jaw drops open. “You can escape!”

“Because that’s what you want? You want to have fun and I’m actively refusing to make this enjoyable for you at all,” Jongin replies. Chanyeol pouts, shoulders slouching and he genuinely looks like a kicked puppy.

Now the question of does Jongin listen to his gut which says to not play into Chanyeol’s desires or does he appease the pretty boy? Jongin knows which side is going to win out in the end.

So he takes off at top speed back the way they came. Jongin isn’t a slow runner by any means, which means that there might actually be a chance of him getting the hell out of here.

Chanyeol fucking whoops and then starts off after Jongin and Jongin can hear him gaining, so he pushes his body as hard as he can, but eventually, he hits the ground. Chanyeol spins Jongin around so they are facing each other with Chanyeol and his stupid, tiny knife sitting in Jongin’s lap.

“Oh no, you caught me,” Jongin deadpans, breath heaving. Chanyeol frowns and straightens himself up, looking sad as hell. His chest rises and falls, also breathing surprisingly hard for just a quick sprint.

“Well, that’s no fun. You’re supposed to fight back.” 

“But I don’t want to die,” Jongin points out.

“Fuck,” Chanyeol mutters. “Neither do most people to be honest.”

“What if you just let me go and stop trying to kill me?” Jongin tries. Chanyeol lowers his face, so they are only a foot apart and gazes into Jongin’s eyes.

“But like,” Chanyeol starts, taking a moment to glance down at Jongin’s lips. “You’re kinda cute.” Jongin blinks and stares back at Chanyeol, not believing the words he’s hearing.

“Are you saying that you’ve been flirting with me this whole time?” Jongin clarifies.

“I don’t know, have I?” Chanyeol counters, looking just a tinge flustered.

“You’re unbelievable,” Jongin mutters. “But if you have, I will take you out on a proper murder date—” Chanyeol’s eyes light up. “Provided you quit trying to kill me.”

“A  _ proper _ murder date you say?”

“Yes. The kind where we kill other people and probably not each other. Though, I make no promises because as hot as you are, you’re getting on my nerves.”

“Goodness, that does sound appealing,” Chanyeol says and Jongin rolls his eyes at the word ‘goodness.’ “I can work with that.” Chanyeol winks for good measure and Jongin can’t decide if he finds that hot or if it’s the complete opposite as that.

“Now will you get off me?”


End file.
